The Longest Wait

The Longest Wait

The past week has been a difficult week. Waiting usually is. My daughter was suppose to go into the hospital yesterday for a 30 day stay at a specialty hospital out of state. We found out last minute that they denied her admission (when the hospital called us). We just got the papers from the insurance company on Saturday. We’ve appealed their decision and are doing what we can. We hoped to have an answer on Friday, Monday at the latest. That didn’t happen. Now it’s nearly noon on Tuesday and we’re still waiting to hear from someone. Waiting sure can be hard.

I have peace about going out of state for a month. I’m not saying that it isn’t going to be hard, but I believe it’s meant to be something that can truly help my child and I have a peace from the Lord. We’ve been blessed to receive help from friends for fuel to drive there and help with my cost of food while there (the hospital doesn’t supply my meals). One of my best friends has offered to keep my oldest daughter whenever needed as well, which is perfect b/c our daughters are best friends. I managed to get a lot of work done in advance to ease the burden and I have everything packed and ready to go. Everything. All we need is the phone call telling us to come.

I’ve had to change our hotel reservations twice already and I’m praying that I don’t have to do that again today.

The past week has been stressful and stress makes me sick. Literally. We have to go. Now.

But still, I’m going to praise Him. I’m going to praise Him if the insurance doesn’t come through and I’m going to praise Him if it does. But we’re believing that it will happen!

Waiting is hard. Not having the control we want is hard. Believing something is going to happen and not seeing it happen (on our timetable) is so hard. Aren’t you glad that He doesn’t give up on us as quickly as we feel like giving up? When we do give up, He’s there, He’s just to forgive us.

I have so much affirmation that we’re meant to go. There was so much up against us when it was time to do the eval and God’s provision was there; perfectly. Then everything went so great! Now this time around, we’ve been met with all these challenges, just dozens of unexpected hurdles, and I have peace we’re going b/c I know that my Father provided so incredibly last time, that no doubt the enemy is trying to thwart our plans to get my daughter better and improve her quality of life (which will improve all of our lives at home).

This waiting is painful, it’s hard, but we’re hopeful. I wish I could say that I’ve been able to wait patiently this time but that hasn’t been the case. I’ve felt like a child the past week. One ready for tantrums. I want to argue with someone about this and there’s nobody to argue with. And He’s growing me, and this growing stuff is tough. Through the peace He’s given me, I stand here confident that we’re leaving soon. I don’t say that pridefully, rather faithfully.